Sunday, March 28, 2010

The Marriage Course

Session Two was held on Tuesday evening and the topic covered was The Art of Communication. This is one of the foundations for a healthy marriage.

Many couples assume that to keep the peace it is better to shut up and sweep everything under the carpet. But this is also a pattern of communication which eventually lead to the failure of the marriage.

Intimacy in marriage requires effective communication. Communication involves the message, the sender and the receiver. It is just like a radio. There is the message, then there must be a transmitter and the receiver (or radio) to receive the message. All must work well. So building intimacy in marriage involves hearing each other’s experiences, thoughts, feelings and desires. It is the break down of communication that eventually collapses a marriage.

The topic of the evening emphasized the importance of talking. Husband and wife need to tell each other their thoughts. Some have been taught to hide feelings and this is unhealthy in a marriage. It takes courage and practice to re-learn to talk at this level.

The barriers to talking were explored. Good communication begins with listening. Most of us take listening for granted yet it is possible to close our ears when the other person is talking. This is known as filters which is a hindrance to listening. Couples were given sufficient time to practice effective listening.

The Bible places great stress on listening: “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19). “Those who answer before listening—that is their folly and their shame” (Proverbs 18:13).

Session Three will be held on this coming Wednesday at Wisma Charis at 7:30pm.

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